Heartache Tips for the Tenderhearted

1) Whatever you’re getting drunk to do, just do it before you start drinking. Call, chant, text, or email the person you’re not supposed to – sober. Say your truth, without the slurring and bar noise. Then, I like to wash down emotional honesty with top shelf vodka.

2) Don’t involve anyone who doesn’t share your bathroom. They. Really. Don’t. Care. And, you don’t want them to.

3) Crying and drinking for 8 hours will eventually taper off to 5 hours and so on and so on. Till one feels better or dialysis is necessary.

4) Eat. If you are crying properly – you WILL get hungry!

5) Laugh. You will feel like laughing, sometime.

About MichelleAdmin

Michelle Wolff’s psychiatrist says she’s “very entertaining”, “a pleasure to work with” and comedy clubs across America agree. Available for hire as a comedian or emcee. Performing across the country, Michelle Wolff has been up at Comedy Store (Hollywood), Flappers (Burbank), The Pint (Chicago), End of the World Tavern (Boston), Funhouse (Portland), and you can see her locally in San Diego, every Friday Winston’s in Ocean Beach. She has been on 89.1 FM KNSJ radio and Fox Television, as the “homeless comedian”. Two guys walked into a bar – laughed their asses off listening to Michelle Wolff. Comfortable in any size venue she’s also, professional, reliable and full of fresh talent. Michelle Wolff is unusual and unusually funny.